Conference Calls…

You Don’t Have to Scream… After the Break…

Conference Calls…

Here’s a scenario: You’re a somebody wherever you work. You’re a manager. You’re a supervisor. You’re a director. Whatever.

You get onto a “conference call” which means, to those few people who don’t know what it means, that there are many people all on one telephone line. It’s sort of like those old “party lines” from yonder days except that it’s all business. Sometimes, you have a bunch of people in one room and there’s someone on the telephone interacting with that group.

Here’s the problem:

Whenever someone decides to put the phone on “speaker” (meaning that, instead of placing the receiver next to your ear in order to hear what someone on the phone is saying, you have the phone’s speaker be the ‘receiver’ so that other people in the room can hear what that person on the phone is saying), the people tend to all scream.

Yes. Scream.

“Hi! Frank! Can! You! Hear! Me!”

“Yes! Carl! I! Can!”

Pro-tip: Interior office walls are not sound-proof. I do not need to hear your conference call as though you and your phone is stationed right next to me. Everyone on the entire floor and the chipmunks in the trees outside of the office can hear you quite clearly.

“Frank! How! Are! The! Numbers! This! Month!”

“I! Just! Got! Back! From! The! Meeting! And! Haven’t! Had! A! Chance! To! Review! Them! Yet!”

I get it – You’re important. You’re one of those “mobile” employees who’s just ‘oh-so-valuable’ because you have offices at five other facilities and the only reason why you’re at this facility right now is because of a meeting and then, at 1 PM, you have to leave to attend this other meeting at another facility and then you have to fly to Rome to kiss the Pope’s ring while discussing world politics with the U.N. General Secretary all while protecting the planet from an alien invasion.

We don’t need to hear your conference call from all of the way across the building. You can turn the volume down on your speaker phone.

Trust us.

Just turn the volume down.

Or you could be like most humans and just have a normal telephone conversation… Through the phone receiver.

The chipmunks in the tree outside of the office don’t need to know how the numbers looked this month.

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