Weekend Edition…

crystal head vodka, aborted review of “ghoul mansion” (fallout 3 mod), adware is not freeware & jv_modelvault (fallout 3 mod) review all after the break…

crystal head vodka…

if this siht is for real, then i must sincerely apologize to ben stein. ben, you are no longer the craziest bat-siht insane celebrity out there. there’s a new boy in town with a straitjacket even tighter then yours. rejoice & have a seat.

just to let everyone in on the secret – apparently, dan ackroyd (yeah, that dan – the one who was in the movie “ghostbusters” & one of the founding members of the television show “saturday night live”) has long been a believer in the mystical & the magical & the supernatural & the what-have-you. now, he’s turned his magically-delicious thoughts into an actual consumable product – vodka served from a skull-shaped bottle.

you read that right – vodka in a skull-shaped bottle.

of course, it’s not just any vodka, mind you, but vodka “quadruple-filtered” (i presume that must mean something amongst vodka drinkers) & then filtered through diamonds. ok.

of course, it’s not just any bottle, mind you, but a skull-shaped bottle modeled after the silly “thirteen crystal skulls” legend that has been thoroughly debunked by now. if you don’t know the myth, there’s a legend that atlantis or the mayans or [fill in your favorite ancient civilization here] made thirteen crystall skulls & when brought together in the same room has some sort of magically delicious powers or something. google it for yourself if you want to delve into the madness that occasionally calls itself “new-age spiritualism.”

dan (i can call you ‘dan,’ right?), let’s talk for a moment, shall we?

dan… dan, dan, dan, dan. it all went downhill after “ghostbusters 2,” didn’t it? yeah, it did. you know, not everyone is meant to be on the a-list forever… or the b-list, or even the c-, d- or e-list, for that matter. it’s ok, dan. it’s ok. everyone gets older. it’s only natural to get out of the way for the new talent. don’t worry about it. you’ll always have “ghostbusters,” dan. no one can take that away from you.

why don’t you have a seat & have some of your vodka, dan, ok? no, no, i insist. have as much of it as you want. you’ve earned it. drink away. just drink away your sorrows, dan. we all have to, at some point in our lives. if it means anything, i don’t think anyone has drank away their sorrows from a skull-shaped bottle before.

aborted review of “ghoul mansion” (fallout 3 mod)…

i tried reviewing this mod but i just wasn’t that much into it. i’m sure that it’s a good mod & a happy mod & a bunch of people will play this & be tickled pink but it just didn’t do anything for me.

in brief, there’s a mansion just outside of the normal boundaries (you have to alter your fallout.ini file to allow you go outside the boundaries) that’s brimming with radioactive feral (feral, as opposed to the talking kind) ghouls. wipe out the ghouls, get the mansion as a safe house.

first off, i had to go all “tcl” just to find a way onto the property. silly me… thinking that i’d get in through the front gate! watch out for the mailbox, though – the post office isn’t screening their mail like they used to. apparently, you can skitter across an overhead highway from an entrance ramp into the property.

i just didn’t have much enthusiasm for this mod as it appears to be a bit heavy on the non-vats combat. i can’t review what i can’t play so, therefore, i called it quits. i’m not even going to mention the fun & excitement that i had just getting to the property the first time, going through the enemies already wandering the wastelands without this mod installed.

so, if you enjoy massive ghoul carnage & want a free home to boot (extra bonus – outside of the normal in-game boundaries), then this mod is for you. otherwise…

adware is not freeware…

i think i wrote about this before but let me write it again for clarity.

adware is not freeware! the end.

jv_modelvault (fallout 3 mod)…

another day, another fallout 3 mod review. let’s go…

name:

  • jv_modelvault (v1.1)

author:

  • “j.vaughn” (uploaded by “vaantal”)

summary:

  • remember “workers’ hall” a day ago? well, here we go again. this time, you find a demonstration vault (aka a “model vault,” hence the name of the mod) right next to your vault (vault 101). includes two raiders & the briefest (but annoying) quest to turn the lights on in the vault. decent backstory but with some holes. currently, it’s a free (but dark) home in case the in-game homes don’t suit your needs.

main review:

jv_modelvault tries to be a good mod & succeeds more then it fails. the readme included with the mod gives you a good indication of where you need to search.

once you find the entrance, your first thought is “where is the key?” well, look down to your right & you’ll find it. now i’m not a huge fan of the lockpicking game (in fact, i’m not a fan of it at all as “mini-games” equals “console” as far as i’m concerned) but to have an unlocked safe, albeit slightly hidden in the ground, is just begging for a wanderer to find it. maybe have it be very easy to pick open or something. i dunno.

ok, the door is opened & you can get into the vault.

first thing you notice is that the immediate interior is dark. ugh. ok, i get it – i’m in an abandoned vault. message received. let’s see if i can turn on the lights. nope, the first terminal that i come to is infected with a virus. hey, when am i going to get this quest that supposedly comes with this mod? when i turn the lights on?

the quest doesn’t introduce itself until you go down the staircase. i don’t agree – i think the quest ought to start the moment you step into the vault itself. i was getting a might bit confused as to what i needed to do to activate the quest. just an opinion.

so, let’s walk down the staircase, shall we? well, remember when i wrote it was dark? well, welcome to the next level of dark, which is almost fcuking pitch black. this makes the lighting up above almost sunshine blinding in comparison.

ok, look – i get it – abandoned vault. message received. however, it ain’t fun bumping around walls trying to find a light switch. trying to find a light switch, btw, is the whole mini-quest & i’ve got no clue what doo-dad is going to accomplish that little feat for me. can i ask the two robots downstairs to turn on the lights? no.

in fact, when i got into the admin section of the vault, i got confused that the robobrain robot down there was actually trying to somehow kill me even though his marker was green. he kept saying things like “stop trying to hide” & crapola like that. however, he’s really just detecting the raiders on the other side of the door. those raiders, btw, don’t stand a chance when i opened the door so that robobrain could obliterate them.

eventually, somehow, i found the switch to turn on the lights in the last room you can possibly enter. of course. quest completed & now, finally, you can actually see what you’re doing. one thing that could’ve helped with the quest is if you could’ve asked the robots “hey! how do i turn on the #$@! lights?” & they’d respond something to the effect of “go into the overseer’s office” or something like that.

there’s a cute little backstory which made me smile because backstories make you actually care about where you are & why you’re doing what you’re doing.

the vault itself is nice. i can’t comment on it like “workers’ hall” because unlike “workers’ hall,” this vault was only meant to be a demonstration model & could afford not to actually be a real, living shelter. therefore, such crapola like wastebaskets & fire extinguishers & things like that all get a pass.

i do have a nitpick about the raiders & why they were trapped in the overseer’s office, though. were they afraid of opening the door & having robo-brain kill them? were they trapped by the cave (inaccessible) that is behind the window (why is there a window) that can’t be opened? that was a little annoying.

another nitpick was the brahmin steak & mutilated arm that is in the demonstration vault. were they left there by the raiders? if they’re there to simply give a nice demo of a typical vault scene, why not label them as “fake brahmin steak” & “fake mutilated arm”?

overall, this was a fairly nice little mod. from what i understand, it may be expanded so that the virus can be cleared out & the virtual reality pod can be used. if so, best of luck to the author because the current mod is a decent foundation for those expansions.

oh – one more thing – if this is a demo vault, maybe have some mannequins in the rooms to demonstrate how people would be interacting with the rooms? cheesy, yes, but we’re dealing with the retro-futuristic 1950’s here. they’d probably do it.

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