more lost paladins…

more lost paladins after the break…

more lost paladins…

i had too much fun yesterday imagining a conversation between spectral warriors, necromancers & werewolves. i figured i’d continue on with another segment…

putrid hand guy (phg) : i see larry is sweeping again.

putrid hand lady (phl) : again?

phg : yeah.

phl : at least someone is doing it.

phg : what does that mean?

phl : excuse me? we’re in an aging ayleid ruin! have you seen the cobwebs?!

phg : we’re necromancers! things like dust & cobwebs shouldn’t bother us!

phl : oh, well, excuse me mr. “reach into a decaying corpse torso & pull out a few vital organs with my bare hands.” some of us value a little cleanliness from time to time.

phg : i’m very sanitary with my necromancy experiments, thank you!

phl : then why does your robe smell worse then the zombies that shuffle around here?

phg : what?

phl : oh, like that’s a big revelation! when did you last clean that robe of yours? before or after we settled into the ruin?

phg : i’ll have you know that this robe…

phl : …needs to be burned! outside! probably kill off any crazed imps in the area, if we’re lucky. i’m running low on imp glands…

phg : and i suppose having your zombies shuffle around all over this ruin is some sort of sanitation effort on your part?

phl : i’m certainly not going to let them interfere when i’m conducting my evil necromancy experiments! the last time i let them loiter around my work, one of them knocked over a very expensive alembic. nearly broke the thing.

phg : why not just lock them up behind the gate with the other zombies? that’s what it’s there for!

phl : do you realize how sensitive phil is about locking up your zombies with his? i’m still hearing it from him about the time i put that stupid werewolf in there with them! “oh, you’re ruining my experiments again!”

phg : well, i have to admit he is a bit of an eccentric…

phl : a bit?

phg : ok, more then a bit but he is a good necromancer & he does let us use his alchemy equipment which, i must add, is quite nice.

phl : it is, isn’t it?

phg : i’ve never asked him directly but where did he get his retort? it’s a very nice model – i’ve been meaning to replace my own at some point…

phl : i think he got it off of some dead adventurer near bravil. you know him, he never opens up until you get him rip-roaring drunk. who knows then if he’s actually telling the truth or not.

phg : well, i have to work on my skeleton champion conjuring skills. i’ll be in dusty room past the other dusty room down the dusty hallway.

phl : you know, if we’re going to be in this ruin for any length of time, we’re going to need some actual names for these rooms.

phg : i know, it’s so confusing… i wonder what all of these rooms were actually used for.

phl : especially the one with the poisonous vents just sticking up out of the bottom of the floor…

phg : yeah, that always seemed kind of weird…

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