Weekend Edition…

tango & cash “remake” & bigfoot (the monster, not the truck) after the break…

tango & cash “remake”…

shot-for-shot remakes are always funny in that sad & pathetic way that you hope people never envision you as. some people did a shot-for-shot remake of the classic horror movie “psycho” quite a few years ago as some sort of uber-homage. a bunch of kids decided to do a shot-for-shot remake of the classic ‘modern-serial’ movie “raiders of the lost ark” & that got all sorts of geek attention because they were kids recreating a movie now firmly implanted in geekdom.

now, two comediannes (one of them is janeane garafalo & yeah, i spelt her first name wrong because i have no idea how to spell her first name – don’t like it then get an easier name to spell) are making a tongue-in-cheek shot-for-shot remake of the ham-fisted action movie “tango & cash.” “tango & cash” is a movie about two cliched alpha-male cops who reluctantly work together to stop a bad guy. it starred kurt russell & sylvester stallone & i’m pretty sure that neither one puts that movie very high up on their resumes when trying to land new acting gigs. i’m not imdb; go elsewhere for the blow-by-blow details.

anyway, they’ve only made two scenes so far & i think that’ll be it for me. this is sort of like “italian spiderman” but one rung higher. yeah, i get it – when you recreate a bad movie, it isn’t just bad but pathetically bad. i think the tv series “the daily show” did something like this with kids performing line readings of actual moments from typical “opinionated” news shows & that was typically a weak segment for laughs as well.

however, i would’ve had more respect for this project had they actually tried doing something with the material other then mocking it. i’m no fan of the movie by any stretch but this project feels too much like a glorified youtube video to actually respect, especially from two comediannes who can definitely shoot higher.

whatever happened to just writing material for a new stand-up routine?

bigfoot (the monster, not the truck)…

this is so stupid it’s hardly worth mentioning but why not. i don’t have anything better to write.

two hunters claim that they found the carcass of a bigfoot monster. unless you were born yesterday, “bigfoot” is just one of many names for a half-man, half-ape creature that is as tall as an nba player & [insert joke about another trait that nba players & bigfoot have which is considered funny since nba players are part of civilized society & bigfoot creatures are primitive].

anyway, the supposed dna sequence doesn’t “match,” primarily because they have nothing to match it to. also, there’s no “chain of custody” for this dna, no one but the oh-so-privileged few have actually seen the body, the body isn’t being preserved by accepted scientific methods… oh, & bigfoot isn’t real.

you know, i was going to write more but i just can’t out of basic human decency.

on the ever-so-slim chance, though, that they have found bigfoot: congratulations.

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