comoros…

comoros & the jonas brothers all after the break…

comoros…

everyone knows that we americans are as dumb as dog siht because, clearly, we don’t know anything about the little ninth-rate country you’re currently hacking us from.

i’m trying to change that.

today, i look at the country of comoros in the wonderful continent of africa.

ok, i actually looked at it two days ago. yesterday, i went on a work-related rant because… well, the less said the better. and, so, yesterday was going to be the day that i commented about comoros but there was the rant & the rant pushed everything aside, but…

today is the day i write about the lovely country of comoros.

see, it’s these 3 tiny tiny islands north of madagascar (did i spell that right? anyway…). actually, there are 4 islands but more about that in a moment.

ok, we start off with these 4 little islands & until the 15th century, nothing much really happened. a few arabs & other sort of cultures land on the islands & the islands make a great pit stop.

at some point, the madagascar people decide to start raiding the islands for slaves. i think that was stupid. i mean, look at the size of the islands – how many slaves do you honestly think you’ll get? it looks like my backyard is larger then these islands. i mean, they’re tiny islands. but anyway, madagascar invades the islands for slaves & stuff.

then the french arrive. the french eventually get all 4 islands under their control & everything is relatively calm (hey, how calm can an african nation be?) until 1975 when the islands declare their independence except for one of the islands that says, “hey, being french is cool” & tells the other 3 islands where they can stuff their croissants. so, to this very day, one of the 4 comoros islands is still french.

the other 3 islands becomes what is known today as “comoros” & this is where the fireworks begins because, like all african nations, the government is as stable as a bi-polar female who hasn’t taken her meds. every year or so, there’s some sort of coup de’tat – and this reminds me – how come you never pronounce the “p” in “coup de’tat”? is it a french thing? it must be french. by the way, a coup de’tat is just fancy talk for an internal takeover.

i don’t know why all these coups are done but they’re done & half of them seem to be done by this guy named bob denard for some reason that i totally forget. bob must not like whoever was leading comoros since he’s constantly trying to take over the comoros for himself but he eventually gets booted out of the whole comoros thing & winds up in south africa & that’s where i lose track of bob.

you’d think that with bob out of the picture everything would be fine but they ain’t because one of the islands turns all extremely islamic radical style & no one likes that & there’s a multi-national effort to oust the islamic regime & it’s successful but the islamic mastermind got away & is in exile somewhere.

dudes need to stop trying to take themselves over. i mean, you’re 3 tiny specks of land. chill out.

and that’s what i learned about the comoros.

the jonas brothers…

if i owned a vagina & i was 11 or 12, i’d probably know these peoples’ first names but i don’t. with brittney spears & lindsay lohan having gone straight to pot & miley cyrus trying to quickly join them, the jonas brothers are looking to fill the teeny-bopper scene. they’re these 3 boys who aren’t boys but they’re young enough to look like boys & one of them has his hair covering his eye just like he was in some sort of real-life anime cartoon…

all i know is that i laughed out loud when i read that they wear purity rings because you know that crap is all bs. they just say that stuff to appease the parents but when their popularity goes through the roof & every chick wants them how are those purity rings going to stop their hormones? just practice safe sex & you’ll be fine.

i wonder how fast they’ll go from being hanson to being on a trivial pursuit card. good luck on the career & avoid the drugs.

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