the webcomic “ctrl-alt-del,” a bunch of old people dying & the whizzball report all after the break…

note – i love deleting comments that don’t follow the rules on the “leaving comments” page.


webcomics is sort of like single-a baseball – you’re glad it’s there but you’d hate to actually have to watch it for the entire game.

as i get older, i have a greater tendency not to waste my time. webcomics increasingly fall into that category of “wasting my time” because they’re very rarely funny & almost always fall into one of three distinct categories:

  • something to do with gaming.
  • something to do with work/politics.
  • something to do with sex.

ha ha, he made a funny about the “big daddies” in the game “bioshock.” ha ha, he made a funny about fat women who smell bad in an office cubicle environment. ha ha, she made a funny about being a male homosexual mistaking a butch lesbian as another male homosexual.

i don’t get it.

the problem i always have with comic strip creators is what i like to call the “crying clown” syndrome. this is when a comic strip that i depend on to be funny decides to take a decidedly dark turn for no other reason then, i guess, “keepin’ it real” or some other shenanigans.

no offense, but i can get all the fcuking downers i could ever hope to want from real news. there’s siht happening all the time around the world that’s seriously depressing. why do you need to make your siht depressing? fcuk, my own life can get pretty fcuking depressing & i don’t even need to go onto the internet to verify it’s depressingness.

so, the latest comic that i’ve had to jettison from my daily view list is a webcomic called “ctrl-alt-del” which is supposedly one of the larger webcomics out there. it has a nice cartoony art style to it & if it was ever in the papers you’d never suspect that it started life on the web.

anyway, for those who don’t know, “ctrl-alt-del” is about these two gamers who are sort of like laurel & hardy in that one is really ditzy & the other one, by default, plays the straight man. there’s also some chick & a robot & a recurring gag (it’s not really funny but at least it’s consistent) that they have a roommate that they never see & a penguin & a chef… on most days, the punchline is that ethan (the ditzy one) is a ditz. ha ha. this is sort of like that “zitz” comic strip where the punchline every third day is that the teenager eats a lot. ha ha, the teenager just cleaned out your fridge in one sitting. ha ha.


wow. ok.

getting back to the point, “ctrl-alt-del” has now jumped the shark by having this oh-so-serious turn of events of the chick having a miscarriage &, i just want to say to all those comic strip people who want to turn all “crying clown” on us… don’t. you know, some of us need a bit of happiness every day in our lives. we need that quarter-second of smirk as we can relate to your chipmunk character getting clocked in the head by an anvil or some guy locking himself out of his house or whatever.

we need good winning over evil, of right finally beating wrong at its own game, of the sun breaking through the storm clouds just long enough to deliver all the rays of sunshine it needs to before busting a cap in that storm cloud’s ass & sending it on it’s merry way.

i’m sorry that you guys feel the need to give your characters cancer or miscarriages or divorces or adultery or tornadoes or other nasty siht. are you doing it for self-respect? being an artiste?

i remember reading a story a long while back of the cable channel nickelodean getting its ass handed to it because it didn’t tell the kiddies watching it that 9/11 happened. nickelodean’s response was to go shove the towers where the sun don’t shine, kids need a place where they can feel safe. i didn’t appreciate that logic at the time but i’m beginning to follow along on why they did what they did.

hey, do what you want. kill your characters. turn them into space zombies where they eat nothing but tangerines while getting their limbs amputated by the number seven. no sweat off my brow. become a billionaire doing so.

i’m going to a place where the clowns don’t cry & dance all day. it ain’t seclusion – i know of the siht that goes on in the world. it’s about going on a vacation for a moment or two before going back to the fcukfest that is everyday life.

i don’t know where i might find that vacation but i know of one less place to look now.

a bunch of old people dying…

there was a whole bunch of old famous people that died during the weekend. i feel bad that they died. i didn’t know them, never shook their hand or anything but i’m sure that they were all good people & stuff. you never know, though. it might just mean that they had really good publicists, that’s all.

stop dying, old people &, for heaven’s sake, stop dying all at once.

the whizzball report…

start = 300. end = 298. net gain = +2.


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