italian spiderman…

italian spiderman & the whizzball report all after the break…

note – the “leaving comments” page must be understood if you want to leave a comment.

italian spiderman…

there’s a difference between a movie that doesn’t have either talent or budget & a movie that has both but tries to act like it has neither.

“fake” b-movies will always be worse then real b-movies because real b-movies try. real b-movies actually try to aim high while the fake b-movies aim as low as possible.

as i’ve gotten older & wiser, i appreciate the real b-movies more then the fake b-movies (“homages,” “parodies,” whatever you want to call them) because the real b-movies were made by real people aspiring to at least put a genuine product out the door. granted, there’s always a rotten apple in the bunch (a phone-it-in actor, a mail-it-in script, a frustrated editor, etc.) because, at the end of the day, it is a b-movie.

fake b-movies don’t aspire to be good, they just want to smartly ridicule the bad in the best way they know how. there’s just something intangibly insulting, as though someone is thumbing their nose at you while trying to be your best friend.

“italian spiderman” pretends to be some sort of ultra-low budget z-grade italian schlock. of course, it isn’t but that doesn’t stop the hordes of mindless youtube addicts from declaring it the best thing since sliced bread or a virus-free porno site. it hits all the right notes that you’d expect schlock parody to hit – lousy acting, lousy framing, bad sound effects, you name it.

in a world where everyone thinks that lying is ok, stealing isn’t stealing, texting is talking, an incoming phone call is oh-so-more important then an actual face-to-face conversation & everything must be snapped with your cell phone to share with your friends… well, a little genuine honesty is more then refreshing, it’s essential.

sure, the old b-movies may not hit all the right notes that the b-movie parodies slam home but that’s not the point. the point is that the b-movies tried to hit the home run, not just miss as spectacularly as possible. anyone can aim to miss; i’ll be impressed when they aim to hit instead.

the whizzball report…

start = 304. end = 303. net gain = +1.

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