love guru…

Mike Myers, social events, Whizzball Report & the personal challenge all after the break…

Mike Myers…

OK. Some advertising blitz must be on because even I’ve seen the advertisements for some Mike Myers movie called “Love Guru.” I hate advertisements & skip right over them on TV but, unfortunately, one slipped through & I saw it. Oh well.

For those who don’t know, Mike Myers is a comedian who got his big break on a television show called “Saturday Night Live” which is a comedy sketch show that should have been put out of it’s misery a long time ago & it hasn’t & now it’s a tradition to laugh at the show because, at one point in time, it really was funny – Kind of like listening to your grandfather’s World War II stories & pretending to be interested.

Anyway, it seems that Mike Myers is one of those “one-trick” comedians because he’s back with a new movie called “Love Guru” which may as well be titled “Austin Powers 4: I need more money.” Everything in this movie just feels the same but I guess they didn’t want to use the same intellectual property because they milked the Austin Powers franchise as dry as a bone. So, instead of being a secret agent from the 60’s, he’s an Indian (as in India) love guru from the psychedelic era.  I don’t actually know what the real plot of this movie is because, as soon as I realized that this was “Austin Powers 4,” I tuned it out.

Heath Ledger dies but this guy is still pumping out “Laugh at the strained pop culture reference joke” movies. That’s poetic justice.

Social events…

I know being anti-social is a bad thing. I’m not stupid. However, I just don’t get along well with people, specifically strangers & even more specifically strangers I don’t really care much about. Its just easier to stay home, cruise the Internet & pretend that some hot chick will have sex with you then to actually go out to bars & “social events” & try to find the one chick who doesn’t look like she falls out of a tree every morning after sleeping face down on a bed of rusty nails the entire night before.

So, I didn’t go to this “social event.”

First, its in a bad part of town. Sorry, I know calling it a “bad part of town” might be construed as slightly racist but I don’t care. Its in a part of town filled with a demographic that just so happens to have a higher crime rate then zero. Otherwise known as “a bad part of town.”

Second, I know what happens at these type of social events – Nothing. It ain’t a singles night so that automatically puts it on the bottom of my “I may care for this someday if I find the time or the Internet is down” pile. Since the Internet was working, that was another strike against it.

Finally, it was on something other then a Friday night or Saturday. Sorry, my weeknights are valuable; “Work” is defined as something other then fun & going to a bad part of town where nothing is likely to happen on a weeknight after a hard day of work is not “fun,” therefore, it is work. I do not work if I have to so the ‘social event’ got canned. Life sucks for me, I’ll die a lonely bachelor. Back to the Internet. Make me a better offer or get me off your stupid mailing list. Since getting me off your stupid mailing list is infinitely easier, I hope you have a nice life. Good bye.

Whizzball Report…

Imagine my surprise when no one was stupid enough to push me down in the Whizzball rankings. That meant I started my day at #537. I quickly began to gain position as I played & on the very last game, I reached a rank of #528. I didn’t expect to get into the 520’s but I did. Good for me. At my pace, I’m set to break into the top 100 in 327 days.

Personal Challenge…

I dunno. I have some envelopes to process here at home. I guess that’s as good as anything else.


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