Fallout 3 Revisited after the break…

Fallout 3 Revisited…

Last year, I received the game “Fallout 3″ for Christmas. Played it. Toyed around with it. Eventually deleted it from the hard drive.

This year, I picked up the “Game of the Year” edition of Fallout 3 with all of the add-ons. Installed it & am playing it now. Well, not “now now”… I’m typing this now. I can’t both type this & play Fallout 3 simultaneously. However, I’m playing “Fallout 3″ in the present tense. If that makes sense.

A year removed from the hype, I have to honestly say that it’s a better game then what I initially thought. I still don’t like the usage of the Fallout IP but, as a game, it’s OK. I haven’t tried out any of the add-ons yet but, at the very least, when I added everything in this time, the game didn’t implode on me “a la” Elder Scrolls 4: Oblivion where I had to uninstall & re-install who knows how many times before the thing & all of it’s little add-on bells & whistles actually worked.

Since I have Fallout 3 in it’s fullest & finest form, I’ll probably start downloading Fallout 3 mods again & doing reviews of them. Going through Fallout3Nexus, I don’t see the outpouring of mods for it on the same scale as Oblivion.

Anyway, if you see Fallout 3 mod reviews here, you’ll know why.

Malware Defense after the break…

Malware Defense…

I honestly don’t know what compels people to write computer viruses, trojans & other nasty programs. I don’t get it. I really don’t.

You would think that these people, already skilled at programming, would put their time towards more productive purposes.

My father’s computer recently became infected with a computer virus called “Malware Defense.” Quite literally, it is a computer virus pretending to be an anti-virus program… The computerized equivalent of a terrorist dressing up in a police officer’s uniform, ransacking your home right in front of you & then claiming that a robber performed the dastardly deed.

Fortunately, the Internet was very helpful in removing this plague from my Dad’s computer. However, dealing with this virus ate up most of an evening.

Congratulations, virus writer – You just killed about six hours of productivity for no good reason other then that you could. My Dad’s computer is back to normal. You didn’t get your precious “sale.” Are you happy now? Would it really kill you to be productive instead of destructive in your skills at programming?

Fallout Dilemma after the break…

Fallout Dilemma…

OK – Before someone sends me a nasty response, let me be perfectly honest – Billions of people would love to have this dilemma. All around the world, people are starving, getting the crap kicked out of them for some trivial reason (they’re from the wrong side of town, ethnicity, race, whatever), oppressed, depressed, the electricity doesn’t always work, sanitation, health care, natural disasters… Yes, I get it that this sounds like, “Do I buy the $500 dollar gold bowling ball or the $500 dollar gold pencil cup holder?” to some people. However, I just thought that I would share this in the event that this issue resonates with a few people. That’s all.

So, in the old days before puberty (B.P.), Christmas presents were supposed to be a relatively secret thing. In other words, you just weren’t supposed to know what “Santa” was going to give to you.

Sure, you made suggestions – You made a “list” so to speak & you could even have a relatively good idea if you were going to get something or not. However, no one ever came up to you & said, “You are getting this.”

Nowadays, though, with the shiny veneer of Christmas clearly marred by older age & a thorough knowledge of the inner machinations of how the Happy Holiday actually works (To appease the kiddies: Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. Now, turn off the Internet & do your homework), present presentation is a little more transparent. It’s sort of like voting on a bill in Congress: You don’t send the bill to the floor without knowing how the vote will turn out first.

What does this all mean? Well, see… Last year, I had thoughts of getting Fallout 3. Then, I had doubts about Fallout 3 & told my parents to hold off on buying it. Did they? Nope. Under the tree was Fallout 3. I never look a gift horse in the mouth so I installed it & played around with it for a little while. Knowing that the DLC (Downloadable Content for all the acronym-impaired) was on it’s way along with the inevitable “GOTY edition” (Game of the Year), I knew that the plain old “Fallout 3″ was obsolete the moment wrapping was torn off of box.

So, seeing a good deal recently for the “GOTY Edition” for Fallout 3, I snapped it up so that I could finally have all the DLC & play the “complete” game. Handing it off to my parents to be a pre-determined Christmas present, this has given me a dilemma -

Do I install Fallout 3 now & simply wait for the DLC in about 2 weeks or do I wait for the whole thing in another 2 weeks? Technically, I already HAVE Fallout 3 & it’s really just the DLC that will be a Christmas present. However, am I defeating the spirit of Christmas by installing Fallout 3 sooner?

Stolen Christmas Lights after the break…

Stolen Christmas Lights…

Let me be blunt – Society & civilization sucks. We will never reach that magical balance between decent people & complete fcuking a$$tards that deserve to be beaten to within an inch of their lives before finally letting them die alone in the middle of some anonymous forest for the animals to feast upon their bodies. For every person who does the right thing, there’s a phone book filled with people who will do the wrong thing & be so bold about it as to try to leverage that into a reality television show (Balloon Boy & White House gate crashers: I’m looking at you &, yes, it’s on purpose).

Today, my family discovered that our outdoor Christmas lights were stolen. The thieves unplugged the lights, wrapped them up & left in the night.

To the complete fcuking a$$holes who stole our Christmas lights: I have no idea if there is a Hell or not. No clue. There’s a bunch of child-humping priests & Popes that say that there’s a Hell. There’s also that thing called “Reality” & “Common Sense” that put a damper on the whole “Fire & Brimstone & Humanoid creatures with pitchforks & horns on their heads” scene. So, make up your own mind in that one narrow aspect of life.

Now, it’s perfectly illegal for me to write anything directly threatening you. That’s a reality. I can be glib about it & threaten a generalized class of people that closely resembles you but not you in particular. However, I’m not even going to do that.

Instead, I’m just going to say that you are a sad fcuker. Really, you are. I have no idea who you are. None.

You could be some crack wohre desperate for a fix & needed the lights to sell so you could get your fix. That makes you sad.

You could be some little teenage fcuk who thought you were being all bada$$ by stealing the lights to show off to your lame little wohre girlfriend or impress your equally loser friends.

Maybe you are homeless & thought that it was OK to steal the lights because, siht, we live in a house & you don’t & that makes it A-OK to take from us.

Was it some stupid college prank & you needed those lights to get into some greek frat/sorority like Delta Delta Lamea$$ Losers Who Can’t Find Real Friends?

At the end of the day, regardless of your lame-a$$ reason for stealing the lights, you look completely pathetic. You just stole $75 dollars worth of lights. Good for fcuking you! Better still, they aren’t putting them back up. Ever. That’s right – They aren’t rewarding your kind with more freebies. That’s a loss for everyone since one of the few joys they had was displaying a little holiday cheer.

Why not find it within your heart (You still have one, right? Probably not) to just put back the lights where you found them? They aren’t yours. That’s the reality.

Pontypool after the break…

Pontypool…

There’s an old saying that goes something like “Nothing is original anymore, you just haven’t heard it like this before.” Before Star Wars, there was Flash Gordon & shortly before Flash Gordon was Buck Rogers. Before Harry Potter there was Dungeons & Dragons but before even that there was The Lord of the Rings & before even that there was Beowulf.

In short, no matter how obscure or “original” your idea may be, someone has thought up something just like it earlier that’s close enough to burst your temporary bubble of happiness over the fact that you thought up of something that no one else has. It’s sort of like an idea’s equivalent of a “family tree.”

The movies “Pontypool” (Aside: Change the name. It sounds like “Panty pool” & quite frankly, that’s like naming a horror movie “Fluffy Kitten Pony Rainbow”) & it’s American-equivalent “Dead Air” seem like fairly novel ideas – A sleepy, small town radio station suddenly finds itself at ground zero when a zombie menace appears out of nowhere. Can the radio station keep reporting the news without being overrun by a zombie menace?

I write about this type of plot because, sadly, I had this very same idea back when I was in college. It just goes to show that, no matter how hard I think, someone has either thought of it before or will happen upon it given enough time. I knew I should have developed that script!

However, both movies are simply an interbreeding of the radio drama “The War of the Worlds” & your run-of-the-mill zombie movie (slow zombies, fast zombies… pick one). They are also obscure little films that either a selectfew will see in an actual theater or the rest of us will one day see on the SyFy channel or in the DVD bargain bin… Which is unfortunate because Hollywood needs more diversity other then “Action Movie,” “Chick Flick,” “Gross Teen Comedy,” “Oscar Contender Drama” & “Horror Movie that Appeals to Teenagers.”

“Pontypool” is both a movie & a radio drama, which I found appealing until I actually tried to listen to the radio drama. In short, I was a bit disappointed because there was too much “Fourth Wall” dialog in the radio version. What makes “audio mockumentaries” such as “The War of the Worlds” & “The Peoria Plague” so effective is that they never break character for a moment – You are there, listening to an actual broadcast as anyone else would. “Pontypool,” the audio drama, tries to have it both ways – Be a typical audio drama but also have the effective punch of a mockumentary – And fails at both because it can’t let go of either one.

About the only thing I could recommend to the people who made “Pontypool” the audio drama is to somehow re-cut it & broadcast it as a raw feed of a radio broadcast recovered from a radio station. You would get the on-air dialog plus you would have a plausible explanation for all of the extra chatter that goes on when the microphone isn’t “on the air.” Probably a moot point but at least that take on the material would bring it in line with something like an audio version of “The Last Broadcast” (What “The Blair Witch Project” ripped off).

So, in conclusion, I definitely appreciate the concept of both “Dead Air” & “Pontypool” but I found the audio drama a bit too safe for my tastes. Want an effective zombie broadcast? Try “The Peoria Plague.”  Hopefully, I’ll be able to catch both movies someday somewhere so that I can review them on their own merits. Until then…

Thieves (Dark Mod mission) review after the break…

Thieves (Dark Mod mission) review…

“Thieves” is a “Dark Mod” mission with a potpourri of contributors. The original map is by “Silencium,” with additional mapping performed by “RailGun and Fidcal” & the story by “Springheel.” Will this be a case of “too many cooks spoil the broth” or will this be a classic “Thief-like” mission worthy of the early “Dark Mod” missions?

Just to let everyone in on the secret, “The Dark Mod” is a modification (“mod”) of the video game “Doom 3.” “The Dark Mod” is, in essence, a recreation of the game play found in the video game franchise “Thief” (or, more specifically, “Thief 1″ & “Thief 2″ but without the intellectual property) but using more up to date graphics & capabilities. Now that you’re out of the coma, let’s continue.

“Thieves” involves our unscrupulous “hero” meddling in a civil war between a thieves’ guild called “The Black Hand” & a breakaway faction. It seems that the breakaway faction has been disrespecting too many people (Black Hand thieves & normal civilians alike) & it is time for the head of the breakaway faction to not breathe anymore. Our character has decided to perform the anti-CPR technique himself if only to get into the good graces of the Black Hand gang if ever there comes a point where such good graces should come in handy. Oh, yes… And also rob the breakaway thieves gang blind.

First, I was able to play this mission all of the way through without a single crash-to-desktop or other similar snafu & for that, I’m very thankful. I played on the Easy setting &, from start to finish, the game took about two hours to complete. I understand that there may be a bug with the hard setting but, since I can’t play it I can’t report on whether that’s true or not. Your System May Vary.

Since the only difference between the difficulty levels were the amount of gold that you needed to “repurpose,” I chose the Easy setting. I understand that the harder levels involved more enemies holding more torches (For the coma-enhanced… Torches equals light & light is bad, especially when you are a thief that relies upon darkness to hide). Again, I didn’t play those settings so I can’t report on how much harder those settings are.

The game starts you off in the city & you must wind your way until you get to a run-down bar that is serving as the gang’s hideout. Two city guards patrolling the streets mean that you just can’t streak your way to the bar. In all fairness, though, the first guard that you meet practically hangs a sign on his back saying “Blackjack Me!” & the other one is immensely avoidable.

One of the things that I liked about this mission is that there appeared to be three ways into the bar: Through the door, through the open window & through a broken out section along the side. I didn’t even spot the broken out section until after I entered the bar. So much for my observation skills.

Once inside the bar, you have to contend with five thieves, not including the boss.

I always hate nitpicking anything because of my unsurprisingly low ability to create virtually anything beyond a “Hello, World!” or equivalent program. However, I also nitpick out of an absolute love for my activities & also want to see them shine as brightly as they can. After all – This is as close to classic “Thief” as we’re ever going to get for the next decade so why not put a little extra love into everything you do? (Yes, I know about “Thief 4″ – For anyone who thinks that “Thief 4″ is going to be either “Thief 1″ or “Thief 2″ but with better graphics & capabilities, you may now stand in a corner, smile & continue to live in your delusional haze.)

There were a few graphical nitpicks about the mission that should be fixed, most notably the ceiling as you descend the bar staircase. Also, I noticed a graphical anomaly above the “tower” when you first start the mission. Fortunately, such sights were few & far between.

A bit more noticeable were some level design quirks. An alleyway takes a a few peculiar turns to reveal… A dead end? Can you open the window at the dead end? Was there supposed to be something here? Is this a not-so-subtle place to put the second guard? Also, you eventually find a loud generator but no way to turn it off. Certainly, the debris around the generator suggests that they were able to turn it on so why not be able to shut it off? Why is the bucket near the generator unable to be picked up? Finally… Why can’t I climb onto roofs? I’m also foiled by invisible walls preventing me from accessing some very accessible roofs.

A major gameplay tenet of “Thief / Dark Mod” is that people wander about in very predictable routes & it is your task to either avoid or incapacitate them. Therefore, you must set aside at least part of your reality expectations when you see people wander about in ways that clearly make no sense in the real world.

Take for instance, a person in this mission who I will call “Bathroom Man.” Bathroom Man, when you first see him, walks in & out of a door, from one room to another. When you finally muster up the courage to follow Bathroom Man, he leads you right into a… bathroom? (Hence the name.) Not only is his entire life composed of walking in & out of a bathroom but he doesn’t even sit down on the toilet! He just walks into the bathroom, stands staring at a light & then turns around, walks back out of the bathroom & repeats all of this endlessly.

Give this guy a story – He has diarrhea or something. Explosive, unpredictable diarrhea. Or maybe he’s sick & needs to constantly visit the toilet because he thinks he’s going to vomit. Give me a reason why this guy does nothing but walk back & forth from the bathroom to the next room. Give him a line saying, “I’m never eating that stew ever again!” or “Oh no, I’m feeling sick!” Something!

Also, what about the man that is, literally, walking around a column? You will meet a man who is walking around what is essentially an one-room area with a column at it’s center. Why? Can you imagine that conversation…

Boss: I want you to patrol this area.

Man: This area?

Boss: Yes, patrol it.

Man: But there’s only one entrance to this area.

Boss: Well… Maybe someone will dig a tunnel & burrow their way up from the ground.

Man: Don’t you think that I could hear that from this area here, near the light?

Boss: Maybe the tunneling is very quiet. A quiet tunneler.

All in all, I enjoyed this little mission. I think that some of the quirks can be forgiven out of gameplay while others should be addressed to elevate the mission from “good” to “very good.” Maybe there should have been one or two more readables but I enjoy readables so that’s never a worry.

So, this Thanksgiving, give thanks to The Dark Mod team for providing to us this wonderful mod & the handful of missions available for it thus far. “Thieves” is an enjoyable mission that will provide some short-term relief to your thieving addictions.

Muppet Bohemian Rhapsody after the break…

Muppet Bohemian Rhapsody…

If you haven’t seen it, you probably will – There is a video currently circulating of The Muppets performing a parody of the song “Bohemian Rhapsody” from the band “Queen.” If you don’t know who “The Muppets” are, or what “Bohemian Rhapsody” is or who “Queen” was, then… Well, you probably didn’t have pubic hair before the year 2000. Or, maybe you’re one of the few youths that appreciates the good stuff which, if you are… Then good for you. You lead an uncharacteristically cultured life amongst your peers. Prepare to be ostracized by them but, don’t worry – Then you get to graduate from high school & gain the magical ability to ignore them for the rest of your life.

I have to be honest to say that I have mixed emotions over not just this venture of The Muppets but their recent foray into that series of tubes known as the Interweb.

Let’s get something straight – I’m talking about the “Walt Disney” Muppets, since the Muppets are now splintered to here, there & everwhere. The Walt Disney Muppets are, in essence, the Muppets featured on “The Muppet Show” & “Muppets Tonight” (and, for all of you completists, yes – Bear in the Big Blue House).

Anyway, just to critique the actual video itself – Overall, it was very nice. Given the closing punchline, I suppose that having a large number of different Muppets was effective but, if you edit out the closing punchline of the video, then having a bajillion different Muppets makes no sense & dilutes the overall impact of the video.

I definitely didn’t like the cameo of Miss Piggy at the end of the song. I’ve never been a huge fan of her brash & unforgivingly aggressive personality & here it simply derails the mellow conclusion of the song. A little Miss Piggy always seems to go an awful long way & this time is no exception.

Probably the best thing about the video are the Animal & Electric Mayhem Band segments (Janice’s tonsils were a bit distracting – Did she always have those?), followed by the mellow conclusion of the song (the part where the “camera” pulls back to reveal all the different muppets).

I’m guessing that all of these 5 or so minute long videos of the Muppets are probably part of some grand strategy to re-introduce The Muppets to a generation of kids who were wearing diapers circa 1995. Some of these videos have been better then others. My only advice to Disney or whoever is jamming their hand up the felt hole is to create original Muppet characters not seen, innovate with creative humor (that is NOT the same as grotesque or pop culture humor – Please recognize the difference) & keep the content flowing. We all enjoy Kermit et all but there needs to be new blood & who, precisely, is the “new blood”? Pepe, the obnoxiously confident prawn? He’s been around for more then a decade. Sal & that monkey? Same deal.

As much as I feel that The Muppets are past their prime, I guess that I still root for them if for no other reason then to live in their renaissance vicariously simply because that’s what you grew up with. You want your past idols to have one more hurrah, a second chance to grab the proverbial brass ring that most people never have even one chance of grabbing… To remain relevant in an age where most people regard you as the answer to some obscure trivia question because then that would mean maybe you have that same chance yourself.

So, to The Muppets… Good show. Now… Top it.

Just Two Screws after the break…

Just Two Screws…

Look, I get it – I’ve got it fairly nice. I live in a country that’s not an ethnic tinderbox waiting to erupt. I can flip a light switch & expect electricity. I can write something & not expect the secret police to arrest me in the middle of the night because some government or monarchial or or religious or dictatorial figure thinks that I am insulting the power structure.

Still, even we in the so-called “privileged” part of the civilized world can have it fairly tough by our standards.

Take, for instance, the mere task of changing the bulb in a headlight on an automobile. Not the toughest of assignments. A high school student could probably accomplish that or even a talented student from a middle school.

A few days ago, part of the bulb from one of my headlights burnt out. I’ve got one of those cars where both the high beams & the regular beams are all inside one bulb.

OK, fine – I go to a store & buy a replacement bulb. I figure that the entire operation will take me 60 minutes… 90 minutes at the absolute most from the time I step outside towards my car to the time I begin to walk back inside after completely finishing the job.

Nope. Not even close.

See… In a perfect world, I remove two screws, the headlight pops off, I take out the old bulb, put in the new bulb, put the headlight back in, screw the two screws back in and… I’m done. The end.

That’s the perfect world. The one that you & I so rarely live in.

Today, those two screws are absolutely corroded. Want to try turning them? Good luck. Hey, here’s a hint – Not happening in your lifetime or mine.

Crap. OK… Fine. I have to take out the entire headlight assembly. How hard can that be? Start laughing now because it’s going to be awhile. First, I have to remove the front bumper. Yeah, it’s going to be that kind of day. But, before you remove the front bumper (Just the plastic cosmetic part, not the part that actually stops your car), you have to remove the some other parts TO GET TO the parts you need to remove the front bumper.

OK… FINE. I get to the front bumper &… There are some plastic pins who’s only job in life are to snap apart the moment that they are handled. Ugh.

FINE! I can replace those little f@!*&ers with actual nuts & bolts. So, I get the headlight assembly out & actually (surprise, surprise) replace the headlight bulb.

However, since it’s already taken a minor miracle to get to THIS headlight assembly, why not replace the bulb in the other headlight assembly? The screws on that assembly are also rusted to heck so I’m just going to have to go through all of the carnage to replace that bulb when/if it ever goes kaput.

FINE!! Let me drive to the nearest auto parts store to get a second AND MATCHING headlight bulb. By the way, while you’re out, can you pick me up some…

So, after hitting seven some-odd stores even though I need only one for the headlight bulb, I come home, put the second bulb in & I’m ready to…

Not so fast. While you’re there, why not clean off the contacts of your battery? They sure need it. And what about the air pressure in your tires? Oil? Transmission fluid? Windshield wiper fluid? Steering fluid? Brake fluid? Grapejuice? (OK, the last one doesn’t count but, by this point, if someone had said that then I’d probably look around the engine for the “Grapefruit” dipstick for about five minutes before catching on).

Oh, and while you’re at it, why not vacuum out the car as well.

FINE!!!!!

Six hours later, I’m done.

I’m tired. My back hurts. Good night.

The Peoria Plague after the break…

The Peoria Plague…

It is said that when Orson Welles was first approached to perform an audio adaptation of H.G. Wells novel “War of the Worlds” he replied that people would not be interested in listening to it. At the time, adaptations of novels hewed as close to the original material as they could, modified only for the format of audio presentation & time constraints. After all, who would want to listen to an audio adaptation of “Dracula” if it was set in the American West & Dracula himself turned out to be a Native American?

Orson Welles guessed correctly that an American audience in the 1930s did not want to listen to a story in the 1800s about the British being invaded by Martians. Most people would have difficulty relating to a different country persecuted during an earlier time. Besides… England, at one time, had not only invaded America twice in it’s young history but had supported the Confederacy during the American Civil War not seventy years prior. How many Americans would sympathize with an aggressor nation receiving their just desserts?

The idea was simple enough – Modify the story to fit an American audience. Set the story in modern times & on American soil. Then, cloak the story in first person by using a fake broadcast.

The rest, as they say, was history.

The 1938 radio broadcast of “War of the Worlds” resonates to this day, partially because of the delivery & partially because of the message. A society witnessing it’s own destruction firsthand, much like a rubber-necking motorist driving past an automobile accident being tended to by emergency personnel. We’re horrified at the event but comforted in knowing that we could always turn the dial or drive away in relative comfort knowing that such terror could never affect us.

“The Peoria Plague” is a 1970s audio drama in much the same way that the 1938 War of the Worlds broadcast was. A news broadcast starts out innocently enough until disturbing events forces the newscast to focus their efforts on a… Well, plague. To reveal any more would be spoiling the story.

I thoroughly enjoyed this audio drama & regret that it is only available in it’s current “copy of a copy of a copy” condition which makes it sound as though it was cheaply recorded over the air using the most incompetent equipment available.

My only storyline quibble with the drama is that an audio tape that the newscast recovers is never sufficiently utilized. It is played once & then ignored, it’s purpose having been fulfilled during the few moments that the tape runs clearly. In my opinion, the tape could have been used to much greater dramatic effect had the storyline succeeded in successfully “unscrambling” the tape at the end & thus revealing that the information on the tape could have prevented the entire plague or otherwise foresaw it.

Whenever people attempt to recreate the shock of “The War of the Worlds” radio broadcast, they so often fail to realize that part of the shock involved a healthy dose of imitating reality. Most often, those people simply take the existing “War of the Worlds” script & merely modify it to fit into their locale but not updating HOW such an event would be covered by today’s standards.

“The Peoria Plague” gets it so much more right then it goes wrong. Although it has little in common with “The War of the Worlds” other then how the drama is formatted, the drama stands next to that hallowed broadcast in effectiveness. Good job.

I Feel Bad for Ireland after the break…

I Feel Bad for Ireland…

I’m just not a soccer (yeah, I know, it’s called football every where else in the world) fan. I really try to watch the sport but I just don’t get it. It’s too fast, there’s never any goals, the ball is always getting kicked out of bounds, there’s something called “offsides” that appears to negate half of the goals that are made… From an American Football perspective, I just don’t get it. I honestly don’t.

However, what I do understand is when your team is completely robbed because of officiating stupidity. As a fan of the New England Patriots, we got robbed in the 2007 Super Bowl. I’m not going to get into the specifics but the bottom line is that the officials allowed the clock to stop when they shouldn’t have. That gave the opposing team the time they needed to win the game. Was it right? Was it wrong? Want specifics? Use “Google” & get the in-depth story yourself.

I know enough about World Cup soccer to know that fans around the world take this stuff as serious as late-stage pancreatic cancer. Every sport has it’s die-hard fans but foreign soccer fans seem to operate on a plane between “nutty fanatico” & “obliviously tyrannical.” All that the game of soccer needs is an origin theory, a symbol & it’s just like any other world-class religion out there. Yes, their adherents are that insane.

So, my sympathies go out to the country of Ireland who feels that they are on solid ground thinking that they were shafted by France in a big soccer match that determines who gets to play in the World Cup & who gets to watch it from a smoke-filled pub. The whole incident involves a player using their hands in soccer that resulted in a goal & stuff like that. Even I know you can’t use your hands in soccer unless you’re a goalie & I only went as far in my soccer profession as a schoolyard.

So, just hang tough, Ireland. It’s always bitterly disappointing when your team loses & loses big AND loses unfairly.

However, brighter skies are ahead. A new day will dawn. The sun will rise as it always will. Think about your family, your neighbors, your job.

It may feel like the end of the world but it ain’t. I know that’s all cheap talk from someone who honestly doesn’t give a crap about soccer but ever sport has fans who get bitterly disappointed when their team snatches defeat from the jaws of victory because of someone else’s blundering.

Join the club.